Please Note: Due to allergies & asthma, no perfume, cologne, or scented chemicals are permitted at funkless events. Thanks!


PREVIOUS FUNKLESS PARTIES

Tinfoil Hat Contest
Feb. 3, 2005


Tinfoil Hat Contest
April 1, 2006



Kindergarten for
"Grown Ups"



Bridesmaidmania 2004

Bridesmaidmania 2005

click here for ALL of the 2005 Bridesmaidmania photos from
luxography.ca


What is Bridesmaidmania? It's a group of fun gals & guys who dig up tacky old bridesmaid or prom dresses, and go on a pub crawl just for the heck of it. It's not a fall down drunk frat boy style pub crawl. Bridesmaids don't get drunk. Just very, very tipsy and laughy. And nobody parties with the zazz and style of a tipsy bridesmaid!!!

want to come to a funkless party?
just write to cynthia.gouldATgmail.com
(change AT into the symbol. take that spammers!)


if you'd like to be on cynthia's weekly-ish email list full of
art, spoken word, music shows, free artsy desktop backgrounds & more, visit cynthiagould.coffeehouse.ca and enter your email in the Mailing List panel

if you'd like to see cynthia's most recent paintings,
please visit cynthiagould.com





funkless is brought to you by cynthiagould.com

be weird. it's amusing.

thanks to nomediakings for webhosting!




NEXT EVENT!
SATURDAY MAY 30, 2015
BRIDESMAIDMANIA EIGHT - RETRORIFFIC


Facebook Event


RULES:
(sorry - there are a few rules!)

1) organizers are responsible for NOTHING and are not responsible people. get your own sorry ass home & stay outta jail, okay?
2) this is a fragrance free event. no perfume, no cologne, no body spray, no kidding. please let the super allergic people have just one night where they can breathe.
3) you MUST be dressed as a tacky bridesmaid to come with us. no entourage! no lookyloos! dress up or get lost! Boys, you can throw a dress over your jeans and be a dude in a dress, or go full drag. If you don't want to take the subway looking tweaky, bring your dress and change at the first stop. WARNING - there is a LOT of walking involved - don't wear heels unless you're a pro!
4) Bridesmaids get tipsy & giggly, not shitfaced & guttery. drink like a "lady".... hahaha i can barely type that with a straight face...



DETAILS:
Imperial Pub Library - 7 pm - Dundas just east of Yonge
Fuel up on pub food, have a first cocktail, meet your new best friends!

Then we're heading to Yonge/Dundas square for a bouquet toss, a quick stop for a shot, then down to Crocodile Rock for around 9:45ish. past that, follow twitter.com/cynthiagould or #bridesmaidmania on Twitter



Want to know about fun events, shows, artsy things? Get on the mailing list at
cynthiagould.com






*******************************



SATURDAY JULY 21, 2012

JUNJUN BAR IS AT 374 COLLEGE ST.
North Side, between Bathurst & Spadina
click for map | Facebook Event


**********************THE RULES*************************

- hats must be made at the party. no pre-made hats! **Actual Construction Time will be approx. an hour & a half**
- what makes a sculpture a "hat"? if it balances on your head during the judging, preferrably unassisted.
- yes, you may use materials in addition to the tinfoil (staples, cardboard, pipecleaners, feathers, etc) but NO glue, NO sparkles, or anything else messy. we all have to clean up quickly after the contest. let's say hats should be 'mostly' tinfoil.
- you must bring your own supplies and clean up after yourself COMPLETELY. (sharing supplies is lovely if you can)
- you will be instructed when the contest begins, and given plenty of warnings before the finish deadline. when someone yells that the contest is over, you must stop construction. actual construction time will be approximately an hour and a half
- are teams allowed? um... sure, why not. but 2 or 3 people, not 84 NASA technicians working on one hat. and only one person may model the hat during judging.... unless you need an assistant to carry the tentacles.
- you must model your own hat for the judging, no fair bringing a hot sexy friend to do that for you. you must bring the hot sexy friend anyway though, because meeting new people is nice for everyone. also, please bring coaches, groupies, and other emotional support. competition is tough you know!
- if you enter the contest, you give us the right to take flattering photos of you & your creation and post them online
- We request that all people at Funkless events do their very best to avoid wearing perfume, cologne, or chemical fragrances (15% of the Canadian population suffers from asthma and/or allergies - so says the Lung Association). However, this is a public place - we cannot prevent anyone from entering.

FURTHER IMPORTANT DETAILS
- if you want to score a good table, get there early - JunJun has great food!
- there will be three prizes, one for Best Engineering, and one for Best Artistry, and a mystery category to be revealed at final judging
- there will be two rounds - first round everyone models their hat, judges will pick a few finalists. during the second round of modelling, judges may ask finalists questions regarding their work.
- judges decisions are final. they may base their decisions on... well, whatever they darn well please. they are the judges! contestants are encouraged to buy them drinks or snacks. bribing judges is fun, but doesn't guarantee you a trophy.
- after the contest, everyone shall partake of the drinks and food at JunJun, and enjoy the fantastic people and music


THE ENTERTAINMENT
DJ TH'ELF and DJ RUB & DOUG will be spinning retro, funk, geekery, and tinfoil inspired oddities. (translation - the music will be freakin' FUN bouncy dance stuff so don't miss it!)

Featuring the geek & tech inspired comedy rantings of SCOTT DELL and KEELAN MILLER,
who both already wear tinfoil hats in the shower.
(Note from Scott: "I would say I am more drug and prostitute inspired, maybe mention how Keelan is an in the closet bisexual." But Scott is terrified to talk to girls, so feel free to freak him out.)


THE JUDGES:
SANDRA KASTURI is a writer and editor at ChiZine Publications,
which makes her an expert in dark, weird, and outright wacky subject matter.
She's also snarky as %@#$!

BARRY SANDERS is a 3D animator at Nelvana, which makes him
an expert in sculpture and oddities.
He's also funny as %@#$!

CYNTHIA GOULD is a graphic designer and drunkrock singer/guitarist
for High Heels Lo Fi, which makes her an expert in wrangling drunk people.
She's likely tipsy right now.



THE PRIZES
Books from ChiZine Publications - surreal, disturbing dark fiction

Be put on the Guestlist to any Toronto Poetry Slam in 2012!

Nanochrist's new CD 'Erase the Sky'

High Heels Lo Fi's EP 'Tequila Funride'

Defence Mechanism's CD "A Shameful Display of Superior Intelligence", and a Digital Download card for the album "Invasion of the Robot Brains From Planet Zero" (Each card gives access to the whole album, outtakes and a comic strip)

"Section K", an amazing book from Timothy Carter

Plus... TROPHIES!!!
Best Engineering, Best Artistry, and... the mystery category!












---------------------------------------------
BRIDESMAIDMANIA SIX
SATURDAY JUNE 25, 2011


JOIN US ON FACEBOOK!

Follow the route &
adventure on Twitter!


#bmm6 starts June 25th @ 7pm near Yonge & Dundas.



BRIDESMAIDMANIA FIVE
SATURDAY MAY 15, 2010



JOIN US ON FACEBOOK!

Follow the route &
adventure on Twitter!


#bmm5 starts May 15th @ 7pm near Yonge & Dundas.




are you coming to NXN2?

NXN2 details



************************************

THE FOURTH ANNUAL
TORONTO TINFOIL HAT CONTEST
Saturday June 28, 2008
Renaissance Cafe, 1938 Danforth Ave. (just west of woodbine subway)
8pm SHARP. Construction begins at 8:15
Details: CLICK HERE!!!!!




Amazing Prizes!
- $100 gift certificate from splitendzhair.ca - Hair By Miranda
- $45 worth of hair products from splitendzhair.ca - Hair By Miranda
- Gift certificate for advertising on toronto-goth.com
- CD from Delica
- chapbooks & CDs from Mike Bryant
- chapbooks from the ever hilarious Jeff Cottrill
- pound of amazing fresh roasted coffee from The Renaissance Cafe
- THE GLORY! oh the sheer GLORY of winning!!!!!



please steal this graphic & repost in your blog!
http://funkless.com/tinfoil2008.jpg





*************************************************


LAST PARTY:
Bridesmaidmania IV - Bouquet Smackdown
May 5, 2007


PHOTOS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

http://www.flickr.com/photos/luxography/sets/72157600192822225/



Thanks & Hugs to Brian Tao of www.luxography.ca for the wonderful photos!


CONTACT: cynthia.gould AT gmail dot com


Click for newspaper clipping of previous Bridesmaidmanias...
Globe & Mail

Toronto Star

National Post (full page)

National Post (zoomed in text)


steal this graphic: http://cynthiagould.com/BMM_4_graphic.jpg





The third annual Tinfoil Hat Contest was a smashing success!!!

The Winners:

mexican wrestlers, a giant squid, a spider & web,
and a hat of a guy making a tinfoil hat of a guy making a tinfoil hat

hundreds of pics:
CLICK HERE

thanks so much to Brian Tao for covering the event! www.luxography.ca!!!!!!!!!!!

special thanks to the following
amazing people & companies who donated prizes!
The Renaissance Cafe
blogtv.ca
mike bryant
jeff cottrill
jill binder
victoria panos
ladyscientist.com
Last Call Poets
Digital Journal




CLICK HERE FOR INFO about the
2007 TORONTO TINFOIL HAT CONTEST








***
click HERE for photos from Kindergarten!





BRIDESMAIDMANIA III photos are online!!!!
www.luxography.ca/gallery/bmm3/
huge thanks to Brian Tao of Luxography.ca!!!